Odd Vintage Products You Won't Find Today

We are used to inventions. New things appear everyday in our world and we embraced them really quickly. In yesteryears people would invent things too, a lot of things, but they didn't have the resources we have now and those inventions mostly failed. From monstrous machines used for applying makeup to flying cars, human beings always tried to solve problems that we didn't know we had. There was a blossom of bizarre inventions in the fifties and sixties, and we gathered the weirdest in this list of the fifty ridiculous products and machines that people actually used in the past. Take a look!


ADVERTISEMENT

BEAUTY MICROMETER

lelalondon

If you think that doing your makeup nowadays is difficult, imagine how it was back in 1930. They designed this thing to mark the spots on the face that needed to be highlighted and reduced with makeup.

DIMPLE MAKER

historybyzim

Invented by Isabella Gilbert in 1936, the Dimplers were used to make dimplers or enlarge your existing ones. Scientist determined that it didn't work and that it actually produced cancer.

ADVERTISEMENT

HAIR PERMER

buzzfeed

Today you can use chemicals and simple stuff to get your perm done, but back in 1930 that wasn't so easy. You needed to use a machine like this one to get curly hair.

ICE MASK

whaleoil

This Ice Mask was created by the same guy that invented the micrometer, who apparently hated women. It was first used to refresh the faces of actresses between shots, but then they discovered that it was good for hangovers.

ADVERTISEMENT

SHOWER HOOD

emlii

After you used the mask for your makeup and the machine for your perm, you wouldn't want to get wet. That's why you need to buy a shower hood, that will keep water out of your face and hair.

THE ISOLATOR

kitschy-kitschy

The Isolator was a thing that looks like out of Silent Hill was was actually intended to keep you concentrated on your work and studies, by isolating you from the noise and visual stimulus. Of course it didn't work.

ADVERTISEMENT

VIBRA FINGER

buzzfeed

Ok, this one is not for what you may be thinking. Or at least it wasn't meant for that. It is a gum massager that is for some reason shaped like an actual finger, because it is easier to buy a mechanic finger than using your fingers.

PACK SMOKER

brooklynmutt

It seems that before smoking was considered a bad habit, people wanted to smoke as much as they could. And for that this device is made, to smoke tons of cigarettes at a time.

ADVERTISEMENT

EGG CUBER

etsystatic

If you (like everyone else in this world) love your eggs square, you need to have an egg cuber at your home. That way you can get your eggs as square as you want.

SCALP MASSAGER

oddee

This doesn't look dangerous at all. Four vibrating disks with four hundred and eighty artificial fingers will remove all dandruff and stimulate the circulation of blood. I wonder if it ever killed someone.

ADVERTISEMENT

Dog

pinterest

That looks dangerous for that poor dog and quite uncomfortable for that lady. That thing was a dog restrainer, because it seems easier to use this thing than to use a regular dog leash.

MOTORIZED ROLLER SKATES

jalopnik

This is actually pretty cool. In 1961 they made a prototype of gas-powered roller skates. You carried the motor as a backpack and a switch on your hand. I want a pair!

ADVERTISEMENT

REDDI-BACON

huffpost

Reddi Bacon was a cool invention presented back in 1964. It was pre-cooked bacon wrapped in foil. You would put the foil inside your toaster and in a few minutes you would have perfect crispy bacon. The problem was that the grease slipped off the foil producing fire hazard and breaking toasters.

POKER FACE MASK

pinterest

Way before Lady Gaga was born (even way before her mother was born) Poker Face had a totally different meaning. This mask was supposed to prevent cheating at poker games.

ADVERTISEMENT

FACE PROTECTOR

cliqueinc

Women in Canada started to wear this cone-shaped masks to protect themselves (and their makeup) from the snowfall. They used to prefer to look like ravens than ruin their looks.

THE BABY DANGLER

lelalondon

Oh, this is not dangerous at all! If you want to go ice skating and you have an annoying toddler to look after, don't worry! Hang him using the baby dangler!

ADVERTISEMENT

REVOLVER CAMERA

imgur

Used in New York in 1938, this revolver had a small camera that shot a picture every time you… well, shot a bullet. I wonder if those were the last photographs of that man.

BABY CAGE

kizaz

And after you take your baby to ice skating, maybe he wants to take some fresh air. If you live in an apartment without backyard, just hang him from the window!

ADVERTISEMENT

PEDESTRIAN CATCHER

imgur

This thing was attached to the car bumper to "catch" the pedestrians that would get in your car's way, supposedly to save them from being run over. It didn't work.

SMOKING UMBRELLA

pinterest

London is known for its wet weather. That can be a problem for smokers. In the beginning of the twentieth century, they invented this weird thing that kept cigarettes dry.

ADVERTISEMENT

FLYING CAR

curbsideclassic

If you think that cars can't fly, that's actually not true. In the seventies some dude made a car that could fly, and fly it did! It travelled from Idaho to California. The prototype was never commercialized because it was too expensive to be rentable.

CAT MEW

pinterest

If you want to scare mice out of your house, or you have the soul of a cat lady but you are allergic to cats, you can buy a Cat-Mew, a device that imitates the sound of cats.

ADVERTISEMENT

TAN VENDING MACHINE

businessinsider

This vending machines were popular in the last years of the forties and the beginning of the fifties. For only ten cents you could apply as much tan as you wanted… only for 30 seconds. The sun is cheaper.

DOUBLE PIPE

businessinsider

I don't understand why someone would've want to share its pipe, but inventors have a solution for every need. There's some romantic tension in that photo, let me tell you.

ADVERTISEMENT

PAIN FREE PUNISHMENT

businessinsidr

Paddling is a thing from the past, you don't see that very often. But at least, some guy had the brilliant idea of making a pain free paddle, so you can punish your kids without too much pain.

TURKEY COOKER

emlii

Who has the time to sit for hours waiting for the turkey to be done? No one. This invention is quite specific and it didn't work out for some reason I don't wanna know.

ADVERTISEMENT

PORTABLE SAUNA

emlii

This portable sauna was made in the sixties and was advertised as a device that helps you to maintain your figure, your vitality and your youth. It looks a little uncomfortable.

MOTORISED SURFBOARD

emlii

That guy doesn't look like a surfer, but that's Joe Gilpin, an inventor who took the time to create a motorised surfboard in the fifties. You probably needed a lot of balance.

ADVERTISEMENT

THE SEXIST BIKE

modernmechanix

I don't understand what the hell was going on in Charles Stainlouf's head when he invented "The Goofybike" but he did invent it. Luckily the weirdest bike of all times didn't work out.

METAL STROLLER

emlii

During World War II people were in panic. A british man invented a trolley that was completely gas proof and it would protect the baby in case of a toxic attack. Luckily it wasn't necessary.

ADVERTISEMENT

GLASSES FOR READING IN BED

pinterest

This is a great invention! I don't know why we don't use it anymore. In the thirties they invented glasses to read more comfortably in bed, a problem that we still have.

CAR COFFEE MAKER

buzzfeed

In 1950, a genius invented a car coffee maker. He was not understood at the time, but his invention could make up to three cups of coffee at the same time, and it also served to boil water and prepare soups.

ADVERTISEMENT

LAWN MOWERS

buzzfeed

There are things that need to be extra comfortable. And there are things that don't. Lawn Mowers need to be safe and effective, but comfortable? This thing had radio, air conditioner and a mini bar.

GLOW IN THE DARK TIRES

buzzfeed

This is cool! In the sixties Goodyear produced tires that could glow in the dark. They were made of transparent rubber and they had light bulbs inside the wheels. I want these in my car.

ADVERTISEMENT

VIBRATING BRAS

buzzfeed

Anything that vibrates too close to the body makes me panic. This vibrating bra, invented in the sixties, was supposed to strengthen breast tissues and make them bigger through vibration. Incomprobable.

SUNNING CHAIR

buzzfeed

People apparently loved to tan in the sixties. A 10 years old girl invented this chair that allow you to read, drink and (in modern days) text without forcing your neck.

ADVERTISEMENT

SPAGHETTI SPINER

buzzfeed

Some people seem to want to be inventors without too much effort. That is the case of this man that invented the spaghetti spinner, a device that solved a problem that no one had.

THE MANUAL GPS

telegraph

This may sound a bit silly, but think about how far ahead in his time was the guy who invented this car navigator in 1930. It only worked in a straight line.

ADVERTISEMENT

THE BED PIANO

dailymail

The thirties was a decade that had a lot of people immobilized in bed for different reasons. This piano was invented for them, so they could play without having to move.

VINTAGE NEWS

wimp

This invention was made for people to get the latest news at any time, via fax. It was quite a technological improvement, even for today, and wasn't seen everyday because of its cost.

ADVERTISEMENT

VIBRATORS

blogspot

Again, this is not what you are thinking. This were weird vibrating platforms located in London that vibrated for some unknown reason. People loved them, look at those happy faces.

ROAD SAFETY MACHINE (A.K.A. VINTAGE ARCADE)

blogspot

This machine was made to test your reactions while driving a motorcycle, but it was also probably very fun, and it worked as an weird arcade game of that time.

ADVERTISEMENT

TRAVELLING HAT

blogspot

A bag? Where we are going we don't need bags, we just need a hat with pockets to put out bathroom products and to let everyone see what brand of toothpaste we use.

A ROBOT

pinterest

Some austrian guy invented a robot that answered the phone, but it couldn't speak. That means that the robot only moved its arm and its hand to pick up the phone.

ADVERTISEMENT

THIS THING

pinterest

Why do you need to look at your back while you are brushing it? I don't know, but if you really do, you can get this device that allows you to do it, using mirrors.

LARYNGAPHONE

blogspot

If you want to keep your conversations secret you probably want to have a Laryngaphone. It sensed the vibrations of your throat so you didn't have to actually make sounds while you speak.

ADVERTISEMENT

HONEGAR

blogspot

Honegat was a mix of Honey and Vinegar. According to its creator, Dr. Jarvis DeForest, it could be used to stop migraines and every kind of pains. I prefer my aspirins.

ANTI THEFT BRIEFCASE

blogspot

If someone wanted to steal your anti-theft briefcase, you could push a button that would made the bottom collapse and all the things you had in there would be scattered on the floor.

ADVERTISEMENT

HAIR DRYER

pinterest

It took a lot of time and prototypes to get to the perfect hairdryer and some may think that we are not there yet. At least today's models are easier to handle.

PORTABLE WASHING MACHINE

pinterest

I think that we need to define "portable" again. That thing is bigger than the woman! How on earth is that washing machine portable? Imagine those machines that weren't portable at all!

ADVERTISEMENT
Show Comments ()